Ready to Try a New Way to Meditate?

focusing felt sense meditation

I just got back from a retreat with my NLP-based coaching program, Transformational Coaching Method. This retreat really opened my heart in several ways, but one of the most awesome nuggets.

Wait, why meditate?

Okay, I think we all know by now how meditation is beneficial. We’ve seen the studies. We’ve read the books. But we still don’t do it.

I was at my wits end after graduation (oops, did I fail to mention I graduated? Blog post on that coming soon). I had so much creativity and passion and yearning inside of me, but I felt all over the place. I decided to commit to meditating. Kind of like when you commit to eating more fruits and vegetables because you know it’s good for you. Yea. I wasn’t happy to do it, I just knew I had to do it.

I want to truly know myself and what I’m great at. And what I’m put on this earth to do. And to have the mental capacity to fulfill it. And all the amazing miracles that meditation sounds like it could provide.

When I ‘stumbled’ on this new form of meditation, it felt amazing. It actually made meditation pleasurable. Like getting to know yourself in a totally different way.

Focusing on a Felt Sense

I learned that this technique is called “Focusing”. To my surprise, there isn’t much online that details how to do it (except for wikiHow… thanks, wikiHow). I found myself able to do it naturally during an exercise at the retreat. I didn’t know it had a name until my new friend, Valerie Green, relationship coach, explained to me the basic steps. Take a seat and watch my latest youtube video. Let’s do it together:


How do you feel?

After I do this form of meditation, I feel a little bit more powerful than when I first sat down. I feel more capable and more in touch with myself and who I am. I feel like I just made a subconscious step forward towards my dreams and goals.

Afterwards, I like to pray a prayer of gratitude for new understandings I gained and the peace I feel.

I can’t guarantee anything

I can’t tell you “Do this for 30 days and your entire life will be changed” because I’ve been doing it for 2 weeks, tops. Haha! I’m the first blogger I know of to post about this, but I guess time will tell how well this form of meditation works for someone like me. Who know? It might be good for someone like you, too.


Let’s connect!

I think I’m starting to get back on this whole posting on your facebook page thing. So join me over on the wonderful blue land of facebook. And if that’s totally lame, I’m on instagram. And if you want to get most intimate, join my e-mail list where I send you sweet notes no one else gets to see.

Interracial Dating when You’re an Immigrant?

Y’all, I am going through it.

My family is Nigerian, but I was raised in the US. The expectations of my older generation simply do not match the expectations and desires of my own. I believe it was Thomas Jefferson who said, essentially, each generation should have a revolution — because our values will not match what used to be.

I happen to cherish interracial dating, despite the opinions of some of my elders. It’s hard. Some immigrant parents are more lax than others, but stricter parents are more difficult to manage. You always want approval from your parents — but how do you get to be yourself and foster that acceptance at the same time?

In the mean time, we girls talked about it. My friend and I decided to start a series called #ShadesofSahara — opinions from Africans (from all over the continent, even white Africans) about our experience in the world.

Check out 3 Nigerian girls talking about dating other Nigerians (and non-Nigerians)

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